Shortcuts

I was recently talking with a friend who does a lot of flying. He works in another city and typically takes the same flight out on Monday of each week. He told me about a woman who tries and very often succeeds in cutting in the line at the check-in counter. This is not middle school, mind you. This is Charlotte-Douglas International Airport and these are grown men and women. Apparently, the woman has a clever shtick in which she sort of moves up near the front and strikes up a conversation about the weather or the commute or whatever and then just sort of works her way into the line.

At one point, she tried this with my friend. He stopped her con mid-sentence and said to her, "Look, I know what you're doing. I see you do it every week. If you want to cut in front of me, that's o.k. but you gotta ask every one of those people behind me first." My friend still sees this woman on Mondays and she still very often works her dark magic--just not directly in front of him.

I enjoy hiking in the mountains of the West. The Rockies are steep. So in order to cover the elevation, trails often work back and forth up the front face of the mountain. These are aptly called "switchbacks." Switchbacks work well but they can become pretty monotonous. After a while, hikers sort of anticipate what's coming. They know the trail will switch-back and continue directly above them so it is tempting to just cut the corners and scramble up the side of the mountain in one place or the next.

Once a few people start doing this, it kills whatever vegetation might have been living there, creates a scar on the side of the mountain and initiates the process of erosion. The rangers put up signs to this effect but there are always people who just can't resist the allure of a shortcut. Of course, scrambling up or down a mountain can sometimes hurt more than the vegetation and scenery.

The Grand Canyon is an incredible place to hike but it does not lend well to shortcuts. Since 1870, roughly 600 people have died in the Grand Canyon. Some of these people have fallen; others have given way to the harsh climate; others have merely wandered off the trail. The danger is real and you need to pay attention but if you do, it is a very rewarding place to hike. You can even hike all the way down and out of the canyon in one day, although it is quite a challenge. If you do this, you will be walking on trails that have been around for hundreds--maybe thousands--of years, established by people that are long gone. These are people who had to regularly hike into the canyon for things like food and water. They had plenty of time to learn what works and what doesn't and why it is sometimes better to take a little more time.

Get Out!

During the run up on gasoline prices, the thing that has been most challenging to me is travel. Not traveling from point A to B but trips to the places I want to reach beyond the city. Living in Charlotte means that we're fairly close to just about anywhere. The mountains are only a couple of hours away. The beach is an hour or two further. And if things get really crazy, most of us can get to Charlotte-Douglas International in about twenty minutes. Not that I ever actually just dropped everything to scurry off to the airport even when flights were cheap. But I found comfort in the option should it come to that.

The cost to fly is still pretty prohibitive but I see that gas prices are coming down again--at least nationally. Here in Charlotte, we are still recovering from the hurricanes in the gulf. In fact, I haven't even seen a station with premium fuel for over a month. But that will all catch up and hopefully we will benefit from a diminishing demand curve like everyone else.

Of course, it's a little ironic that clearing our minds and refreshing our spirits would be dependent on the price of gas. It's actually kind of scary to think about--burning fossil fuel just to get some fresh air...

But it does feel that way sometimes. It seems that the only excuse we can find to even go outside is to go someplace far away. It actually takes some imagination and discipline to think about mind clearing and spirit refreshing options that might be just outside our doors.

But I suspect it's worth it. In fact, I think our health and sanity in some ways depend upon it. We need to get outside. If even for a bike ride to a nearby park or a walk to the closest coffee shop. The world looks different when we're not looking at it through a computer screen (hmmm). Time feels different as well.

If we want to get a sense of this, here's an experiment to try. Pick a safe mile or so near the house and drive it at the posted speed limit looking around as we drive. Then go back to the house, park the car and walk that same mile. We will be surprised not only by what we see but by how we feel about it. Insects, old candy wrappers, the way a heavy truck lays a track in the Carolina mud--things that we would never dream could hold our attention somehow become interesting....And even if they don't, we'll still be getting some exercise and breathing some air that didn't just come out of some else's mouth.

Bye the way, above is a shot from Zion National Park. I was hiking with friends last Spring. It was the weekend that Carolina got pummeled by Kansas in the NCAA semi-final. Still found time to see that though. Go Duke!

When It's Your Turn

I recently had a conversation with a friend who has been going through a difficult stretch. Actually, he has been going through about a sixteen month stretch. And although it has been his own cross to bear, he has been willing to share some of the what this has been like with me. This is a precarious thing. On the one hand, I am pleased to be a sounding board for my friend. But on the other hand, sixteen months is a long time. It is difficult to see someone you care about in the midst of a fiery trial.

Listening to the trials and tribulations of someone else is very different than living them yourself. During our last conversation, this became more clear than ever. I could tell that my friend had been keeping on for a long time. And to be honest, he really wasn't showing any signs of defeat but I am sure that the people around him are getting a little weary. Not people like me, who simply get to share in the journey from a distance but the people closest to him, especially his family.

There are some roads in this life that we have to walk alone. I am not sure whether or not everyone has to do this at one point or another but I do know that at least some of us do. Perhaps sometimes this is just part and parcel to life in the world. We find ourselves in a transitional period and there just isn't anyone else around to help us carry the load. But sometimes it is more than this. Sometimes we find ourselves smack dab in the middle of a spiritual journey in which we are forced to battle the elements and the demons all by ourselves.

Native American spirituality refers to this as a Vision Quest. It is considered a critical time in which one encounters the spirit world and comes to know his or her life path. In Christian spirituality, this is often called a trial or test. It is a sojourn in the spiritual wilderness. It is a time in which the believer learns to trust God in a much more pronounced way. Facing the challenges with nothing more than faith forges our hearts and makes us ready for whatever it is that God has in store for our lives.

I had my primary wilderness experience many years ago. It was not something that I was looking for and it was not enjoyable. But now, so many years later, I see this difficult period of my life as an indispensable gift.

Of course, right? Journeys always make sense AFTER they're over and we are safely on the other side. During that most recent conversation with my friend, I kept thinking about my own experience. The more he told me, the more sure I was sure that he was on a Vision Quest. And no matter how much I might have liked to give him a map or offer him a shortcut, I knew that it was not for me to do.

You see, it is his time. It is his turn. I can be there as a friend and as a fellow journeyman but whatever God is doing in this man's life and whatever God might have planned--these things are between God and my friend. In other words, all evidence to the contrary, this is holy space. God is forging this man's future.

Side effects

Earlier this week I spent the noon hour playing basketball. I caught up with a group of guys that I used to play with regularly. I was a step slow and a bit out of shape. This was frustrating but understandable given how little I have played lately. Of course, most of the guys had not taken the time off so they were conditioned and enthusiastic about the competition.

In the midst of this, I found myself in a conflict with the guy that was guarding me. I got knocked down a couple of times and the frustration started working on my composure. I ended up saying some things that were regrettable to say the least. Part of this was due to getting knocked to the floor by a guy who was playing a curious style of defense. Even so, my comments were inexcusable.

The experience put a sour tasted in my mouth that lasted the day. I had gone to enjoy the company of friends and get some physical exercise but it turned out to be more an exercise in how to ruin your day. As I drove home, I really couldn't even explain why I lost my composure. I knew the guys I was playing with. I knew that some of them had some annoying habits that got on my nerves from time to time. I really had no reason to let it get to me like it did. When I went to bed that night, I was still bothered. I thought about getting up and phoning in an apology for my actions but I it was eleven 0'clock so I decided it could wait until the next day.

The following day, my wife told me about a study that had looked into how the economic downturn is impacting our health. Initially, I greeted her news with my usual suspicion. Of course, someone's out there doing a study on something like this. But then I remembered my actions from the day before. Not that I would attribute acting like an ass to the decline in the stock market but I think that there probably is a more general connection.

We have lots of things going on in our lives. We have lots of people to deal with on a daily basis. There are any number of factors that are capable of sabotaging our spirits on any given day. There is really no getting around this. And there are certainly many things well beyond our control. But at the same time, knowing this or anticipating how these things might work on us might help us keep them from creeping into places where they don't belong.

I was recently asked by a person in the parish to speak to issue of "staying in love with God." I was a little intimidated by the question, especially because it came during the same week as this story that I just shared. Following is my response to the question.

Love is a word that gets tossed about a good bit in our society—sometimes too casually, sometimes too seriously. When I think of staying in love with God, I think of maintaining an appropriate posture of gratitude and wonder. I think we need to work at this much like we need to work at our marriages. It is very easy to take for granted the people who are the closest to us. This is really abusive but it is common. It is just easy to take our spouses for granted because we expect them to always be there. I sense that it is the same with God. Take giving for example, many people pay God last. That is, they figure out their offering after they have paid their bills, taxes, IRA and even their credit cards. God gets not the first fruits but some percentage of the leftovers. Imagine being treated this way by your husband or your wife—and sometimes we are. That is, at the end of the day we get whatever is left and it is often not all that much.

So I think staying in love with God means attending to God first. Maybe this means just a small prayer at the beginning and the end of the day. Maybe it means giving something of ourselves when we would really like to just take a nap. The book of Micah has a very revealing reference to our relationship with God. Basically, the prophet asks, “what does God want from us?” Another way of putting this might be “How can we best love God?” Here is the reading:

6‘With what shall I come before the Lord,
and bow myself before God on high?
Shall I come before him with burnt-offerings,
with calves a year old?
7Will the Lord be pleased with thousands of rams,
with tens of thousands of rivers of oil?
Shall I give my firstborn for my transgression,
the fruit of my body for the sin of my soul?’
8He has told you, O mortal, what is good;
and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God? (Micah 6:6-8)

In other words, the measure of our love for God is very much tied to the way that we treat other people. Jesus makes a similar point when he asks the lawyer about the greatest commandment. The writer of 1 John puts it this way:

We love because he first loved us. 20Those who say, ‘I love God’, and hate their brothers or sisters, are liars; for those who do not love a brother or sister whom they have seen, cannot love God whom they have not seen. 21The commandment we have from him is this: those who love God must love their brothers and sisters also. (1 John 4:19-21)

So one of the ways that we stay in love with God is by trying to maintain authentic and peaceful relations with the people around us. Sometimes we don’t feel caring and peaceful. This is normal and o.k. to a degree but after a while we usually start feeling pretty lousy inside and it is hard to pray when all you can think about is some stupid thing you said to somebody that day. So if we are paying attention, we can try to right that wrong and I think that this, in turn, helps honor our love for God