Sufficient Grace

...Therefore, to keep me from being too elated, a thorn was given to me in the flesh, a messenger of Satan to torment me, to keep me from being too elated. Three times I appealed to the Lord about this, that it would leave me, but he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.’... (2 Corinthians 12:7-9)

There is a long and intriguing mystery about Paul's reference here in 2 Corinthians. What exactly was that legendary "thorn?" What was it that the devil used to keep Paul's comfort and joy at bay? That subject of torment...Was it a physical ailment? Was it a psychological disorder or a spiritual weakness? Was it a carnal desire or some deep-seated insecurity? Perhaps it was a loneliness that came from the constant travel. Or maybe it was a steady annoyance inspired by the company that he was forced to keep?

Whatever it was... We don't know. We will probably never know--unless by some chance event we catch the Apostle some day over a cup of coffee in heaven. Fat chance though--something tells me that Paul's heaven will not include time for coffee. I could be wrong though.

But I get the deal. I get the frustration and I get the answer. I live by the answer. My grace is sufficient... For Paul. For Me. For You. For whatever it is that ails us... The Lord has the remedy. And the remedy... it isn't a pill or a fortune or a get-outta-jail-free card.

And that has become the exact thing I was hoping to hear. I first heard it many years ago. I was suffering under my "torment of the year" or decade. At wits end and losing both my youth and strength. Knowing but not really knowing how faith works and all that. And God threw me a line. Pulled my head up out of the mire just enough to get me through. It wasn't complete--and thank God! Who wants to be completely rescued? Of course, I couldn't fully appreciate it at the time but it was enough. Enough to get me through and, more importantly, enough to learn that it is all about enough--just enough to see us through.

There is music in my world. And it's not esoteric harps in my head. It is the music of other people. People who seem awake and able to see and feel the pain and appreciate the wonder.

I don't have a wide list of things that save me but the short list is as precious as oxygen. An honest song or a great story. It's sufficient to see me through another day or at least a few more hours... Patty Griffin and Stephan Jenkins, Noel and Liam Gallagher, Jenny Lewis and Adam Duritz, Tracy Chapman and Jackson Browne... Did God send these folks into the world to keep me alive? No, but their voices have often reached me at the exact moment...

I can only trust that it is the same for the rest of us. Not that you are saved by my music or by any music for that matter. But that there is grace sufficient for you too. In whatever form works. Whatever language can break through the torment that keeps your comfort and joy at bay.

If you follow what I am saying here, here's to hanging on! We've made it through another stretch! If you feel as though the grace in your life is just not quite cutting it...Don't give up. Keep looking and keep bugging God about it. If the journey feels long and weary, let God know about it. You probably won't get the get-outta-jail-free card. But it might just be that you really don't want that anyway.